This saying has caught my attention, because I have been noticing people who talk a lot about their problems with friends not knowing how harmful this can be. I do believe that it's very important not to turn away from our pain, and face our fears by embracing our emotional state. However it's also important to find a safe space to do that, or we will all become like crying babies.
When we have a virus we don't go out hugging people... when we have an upset stomach we don't vomit on people... Right?
Emotional outburst must be treated like any other physical debilitation - you either go see a therapist or a coach, or you retreat so you can heal naturally by processing your own stuff.
There are numerous ways to fully express our emotions: breath deeply, walk in nature, exercise, cry,,, (just to name a few); but it seems like the most common way is to talk about it over and over with other people. Although this may bring a bit of relief, it's not what true healing is about.
On the other hand, I believe that by talking incessantly about what we don't want, brings more of that - which is not wanted - into our lives.
How about the person (or people) you decide to choose as your outburst container? Do you think they are prepared to take your stuff? What is the impact of hearing your negative feelings going to create in their lives? What are you spreading out? What's your (default) intention?
I'm not saying pretend everything is fine when things are not... but don't just use people to be your "healer" because they are not prepared to do so and it will affect their lives as well.
Also be careful not to use religion, yoga or any spiritual activity to bypass your emotional bruises. Like anything else, to me, it's about the middle way. How can I be genuine and authentic with my feelings without "contaminating" anyone else?
Perhaps you are not a talker, and you don't really behave this way, but what about your self talk? Are you addicted to beating yourself up and shut down so that people won't realize how unhappy you are? This isn't good either!
It's time to wake up! Stand up and say: yes, I'm in denial! This is no different then the AA (Alcoholics Anonymous)! There are 12 steps on their program that help people with various addictions and compulsive behavior. The first step is to say: "Yes, I admit I was powerless over this situation (in their case alcohol) and my life had become unmanageable. If you are adicted to talk or think "complaining" all the time, do this! Accept and change. Here's an excerpt from Teal Swan about denial, she calls it "spiritual bypassing". I find very interesting:
"Spiritual bypassing (or whitewashing) is the act of using spiritual beliefs to avoid facing or healing one's painful feelings, unresolved wounds and unmet needs. It is a state of avoidance. Because it is a state of avoidance, it is a state of resistance. I personally, consider Spiritual bypassing to be the shadow side of spirituality. The spiritual beliefs of any spiritual tradition, be it Christian, Hindu, Buddhist, New Age, Islamic, or even Self Help, can provide ample justification for living in a state of inauthenticity. They can all provide justification for avoiding the unwanted aspects of one's own feelings and state of being in favor of what is considered to be "a more enlightened state".
So, do not bypass your emotions, but also do not use people for negative venting either. If you can afford, or if your insurance pays, look for professional help. Coaches and Therapists are trained for that. Also, there are plenty of complimentary help online in youtube, or google. There are many groups that are designed to support one another. Google - your feelings and write help - I guarantee you will find a lot of positive information.
What do you say? Do you or someone you know suppress their emotions? Do you or someone you know use religion to avoid processing their own shadows? Do you or someone you know use other people to vent about their problems? In your view, what is the best way to be real and express vulnerability without using others as your therapist or coach?
Namaste Rosane CPC, ELI-MP
Woman's Retreat in Sedona - Nov 13-17, 2019 Only 3 space left! Email Barbie for more information. POWER2EMPOWERWOMEN@GMAIL.COM
I have to say I'm living quite an adventurous life! My life in Sedona is quite different from how it used to be when I was living in Tampa and flying around the world as an International Flight Attendant.
It has been three years since I've retired my high heels for boots and cowboy hats. I now take people to hike in the red mountains of the old west. Five years ago this was just a dream, a vision, and quite impossible to become a reality. But here I am, loving every moment!
It's quite adventurous to hike everyday with amazing people from all over the world. Instead of being a "Flight Attendant", I am now an "Earth Attendant" hahaha!
Here is when my daily adventure gets exciting! During a sunrise hike the other day we were notified by the Forest Service that a mountain lion was in the area...
George, from San Francisco, was a bit nervous but he thought it would be an epic post for Instagram. There he was, at dawn, on top of the mountain, in a confident pose to scare the mountain lion away!
Last weekend, we saw this snake box at the trail head!
I thought what do they do with the snakes? Oh well,,,, could not find an answer yet...
At our house, we are often visited by javelinas, bobcats, deer and quail. Isn't this an interesting mix of animals?
Very thrilling for an ex city girl like me! Here is a video with the javalinas and their babies...
But.... don't worry! I got your back! I'm becoming a savvy guide playing with the vortex energy and practicing the activities I share on my hikes. Especially the FOUR STEPS TO CENTER that makes us SUPER HUMANS!
We learn to create a powerful energetic shield around us that only attracts delightful happenings! I have noticed that with these practices even baby dinos become close friends - hahaha!
Talking about adventure.... last weekend I went to Antilope Canyon with my friend Anna!
we had such a great time exploring this ancient place! It's a must-do visit if you haven't yet explored the Grand Canyon Area. I couldn't resist performing my POETRY IN MOTION - BODY PRAYER Watch this video and you will feel that you are there with me!
This video clip is from my last VORTEX DANCE with Cindy and Lorene from California.
They were so connected with spontaneous movement that happened in the moment - no choreography - no planing... just us in sync with the moment and the Vortex of Sedona... If you like to dance, come experience this powerful activity with me!
Our RETREAT is coming up in November!
I would love that you join us! If you are hearing the call of Sedona, it's because your soul needs this!! Trust your intuition and hurry up and register! I promise that you will go back home fully transformed and empowered to create the life you will love to live! Look how beautiful the retreat house is and... Retreat information
Woman's Retreat in Sedona - Nov 13-17, 2019 Only 3 space left! Email Barbie for more information. POWER2EMPOWERWOMEN@GMAIL.COM
If you are far away, remember that we can always connect online. What a magical time we are living, agree?
Now it's your turn! How about you? What's new? What life adventures do you have to share with me?
Write in the comments below or send me an email to Rosane@RosaneLifeCoach.com
Summer was super hot in Arizona but not so much in Sedona, which is five thousand feet higher then Phoenix.
Because of lower temperatures in winter time, the "saguaro cactus" doesn't grow in Sedona...
But it does grow in Phoenix. So, every time I go to Phoenix, I stop to admire the saguaros!!
This time, my friends Kimberly and Reinaldo came visit me and off course we had to stop to dance and play around the saguaros. There's a video at the bottom for you to enjoy and laugh with us!
I have been super delighted with the people I meet at my hiking therapy events. Particularly impressed with the number of millenniums: young men and women in search of wisdom. I feel so grateful for being able to guide and inspire them towards their road to love and success! My last hike with Teresa, from California, was amazing and we ended up twirling around the Peace Park with purple silk veils! Teresa came to Sedona to gain clarity regarding her life's purpose and went back with a bag full of bliss!
My friend Reinaldo couldn't get over the beauty of everyday's sunset!
My friend Kimberly and I had so much fun walking in the shallow crystal clear water of oak creek!
The Oak Creek in Sedona is a perfect place to be during hot summer! We lost touch with time and the day went by like an enchanted tale...
Kimberly is very knowledgeable about natural herbs and she wanted to learn more about Arizona plants' medicinal properties.
She downloaded an app on her phone that reads the plant's characteristics through a simple photo.
Fascinating time we are living, isn't it? We stoped several times along the creek to learn about wild flowers and plants.
Coaching this group was so much fun that when the experience was over, I was already missing them!!!
SEDONA VORTEX YIN & YANG Energy Practice
I love knowing that the exercises I teach at my hikes are cherished by those who come looking for answers to empower their every day life.
I love sharing my favorite "ACTIVE MEDITATION PRACTICE" that you can do anywhere, even at the store when you are shopping!!
If YOU feel an impulse to come to Sedona, I have great news! A Retreat in November! Check out the retreat house and many activities that will take place. Hurry up, it's limited for only 10 ladies! You can learn more about the retreat at this link: THE DRAGONFLY WOMEN'S RETREAT
Here is our fun video, recorded with my friends Reinaldo and Kimberly in our way to Sedona from Phoenix airport. I hope this makes you laugh as much as we did!
Now I can't wait to hear YOUR NEWS!!! Write in the comments below or send an email to Rosane@RosaneLifeCoach.com Cheers! Rosane
When I take people hiking in Sedona, I share with them a couple of my most favorite meditations that take less then a minute to do! No kidding, I'm serious! One of them, four steps to center takes me literally 4 seconds. The other one which is about the five senses, takes about 3 minutes.
Even though I practice these two meditations all the time, I also have many others that I like to do through out the day. Sometimes I combine methods, and I even have fun meditating.
There are a lot of misconceptions about meditation. Some of them makes me laugh! "You have to be a buddhist, hindu or religious"- not true! Meditation is not a religion, although, many religions use meditation as a practice. You can practice meditation even if you are atheist. Meditation is about controlling the mind, that's all. You will learn to be the master of your thoughts!
"If you practice meditation you are a hippie or esoteric person" - not true! Nowadays people are meditating in the air force, and even in the White House! There are many famous actors and singers who meditate as well: Jim Carrey, Jennifer Aniston, Paul McCartney just to mention a few...
Meditation has so many benefits but I had numerous resistance about it in the past. I didn't want to seat for a long time with crossed legs and I didn’t like the concept of “emptying the mind”.
Well those were two of my misconceptions about meditation. It doesn’t have to be long, in fact, my most powerful practices take seconds, I do it anywhere, standing or seating. And it's not about emptying the mind, it's about observing the mind, so that you can be in control instead of feeling defeated by your incessant inner chat.
If you think like I used to think about meditation, I hope this will change your mind, because you’re missing out on the incredible, valuable benefits you can have, such as: better sleep, more focus and clarity, feel relaxed and in purpose, release anxiety and stress etc... The list of benefits is immense!
I used to be all over the place, feeling like I was never doing enough... always anxious about something else that I needed to do. Well, no more! You know why? Because I have embraced the practice of meditation.
It's not easy in the beginning, because we, human beings, have this thing: We don't like to do anything that takes us out of the "comfort zone". Exercise? You're kidding right?, Eat different healthy food? Oh.. nooo... too much work! ... Anyway, you know what I mean, right?
The thing is that it's only by overcoming discomfort that we can achieve what we want. Wether it's a fit body, or a calm mind, we must compromise to shift old comfortable habits.
It's been proved that it takes 21 days to shift or create a new habit, so... I have put together an audio program to help people who have never meditated before, and may have misconceptions about meditation, just like I did... I call It “Meditation is Simple”.
If this is something you would like to do, watch my video below and and click on the link below to receive the first meditation for free! If you like it, and want more, there’s a link to buy the program there, for less then a dollar a day.
I hope you break through your comfort zone and start practicing meditation, because the benefits are numerous, including calm and clarity.
How would it be like to have more calm and clarity in your daily life?
Do it and share with your friends, perhaps you can meditate together or have a Meditation Party!!
So much happening lately that I've decided to make a video to show you! This short video displays several instances of activities I've been doing with clients in Sedona.
Sedona has kept me busy with experiences that I am now offering also to Airbnb visitors, besides private retreats. This month I found myself using google translator a lot to communicate with people from Thailand and Japan. I love to serve the world!
I have also been coaching privately online and working on very special and affordable group programs to be able to help more people around the world. One of the programs is about finding your inner joy and the other is about finding love. These programs will be available soon! If you are interested, drop me a note.
And you? What's happening in your neck of the woods? I would love to hear from YOU!! You can use the comment space below to drop me a message.
Hope to see you in Sedona some day!
Much love Rosane
WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING:
"I recently attended both a sunset vortex hike and the vortex dancing with Rosane during my visit to Sedona. What a wonderful decision that was to do both, and what a wonderful experience the vortex dancing was. Whether you are just looking for something interesting and fun to do, or if you are looking for a deep experience, Rosane's vortex dance delivers. She is a fabulous dancer and a fabulous person, a true pint-sized can-of-JOY that infects you with her spirit. Thank you Rosane for an amazing experience that I would highly recommend to anyone! Fabulous!!!" ~Tina - Steamboat, CO
"What a fun experience! Rosane is fabulous, open, and generous. She really knows how to connect with people in an authentic way. If you're thinking about signing up, just do it now and be "all in" when it's happening, you won't regret it. She takes you through different activities to get you and keep you moving in the right direction!" ~Kim - Oakland, CA
"Rosane’s passion for what she does is contagious! She brings in such uplifting energy that you can’t help but be excited to be part of this experience. She genuinely cares and wants to see you become your best self. Though her exercises are group activities, she will work with you individually to help you with your unique situation. She has an abundance of wisdom that she channels into physical activity, which is extremely effective. Loved this experience and I hope many more people have the opportunity to connect with Rosane!" ~Laura - Orlando, FL
I’m sorry for this” ... “I’m so sorry for that “ ... “Im sorry for myself” ... Is the feeling of pity taking you hostage?
Last week I had several clients who are going through this feeling: "pity" ...
This feeling of "pity" is horrible for you!
To feel pity is worse than to feel anger! Anger has movement! Pity locks you in a chain of remorse, unconformity ... Pity does not help others ... it disturbs!
Pity is like a weed that sucks the energy of the plant ... like a vampire!!...
Do you know why? Because pity begs for attention ... even if crumbs of affection "please pity me" ... "please like me just a little" ... "love me please, because I cannot love myself ".... “ so someone else has to do that job!
And if they don’t? Ahhhh .. I will pity myself some more!
Pity is melancholic, dramatic and sticky disgusting energy that repels all good things to come to you.
You also don’t help people by pitying them! If you feel sorry for people or the world, you are actually contributing to their misery (energetically speaking)
Don’t lose your time praying or meditating when you are in that state! It's no use praying or meditating if you have that chronic feeling of pity ... Do you know why? Because you will be enhancing this energy as you pray for help... and you are not going to be able to access inner peace through meditation because “pity” won’t let you...
If this feeling of pity is rooted inside of you, do this:
(This is a process of energy transmutation, only for the purpose of releasing this energy)
- First get angry! Anything goes: get angry about people, angry about the world, angry about yourself...
- Then, punch pillows!! Or go to the forest and scream out loud until you get very exhausted.... Breath that feeling out of your system!
- After you put the anger out, think like this: What feelings can I invite to stay inside me? What feelings would give me power now? Perhaps you could start with “indifference” ... or “pride” ... that’s okay! Its a bridge! It's better than pity!
- Gradually, raise your energy to more noble feelings, such as: understanding, love ... acceptance... peace...
My work as a Coach is to access the vibratory energy of the client, bringing awareness to what they perceive as true, and help them shift their energy levels to love, peace and joy.
So, no more pity please! If you can't do this by yourself, reach out and I'll give you a hand!
We are like flowers. We're either growing and blooming, or we're withering and dying. Conflicting energy can make us sick and it may never cease, unless you take control of your emotions and don't let outside events affect you.
Does it look like everyone around you wants to create a fight? Do you feel like you are in a constant conflict weather with people, situations or yourself?
You are not alone. Most people feel victimized, that's why we have so many lawyers in the world! I would like to share with you why this may be happening in your life and offer you a different perspective so you can shift these conflicting energies.
You can do this by "reframing" what happened. Reframe means to give it a new perspective, to understand it from a different point of view. If you don't do that, the price you pay is too high. You jeopardize your wellbeing, and by doing so you are not in service to the betterment of the world either!
I'm not saying you are right or wrong. I'm saying that staying in the conflict zone is poisoning to you. Understand? It's like wearing boxing gloves all the time! You may feel like if you don't protect yourself people may take advantage of you, or people may stab you in the back... so you are ready to "punch"!
Here is an example of how our minds work. If I say doctors kill people, I will collect evidence that my belief is true. I can google cases of medical malpractice and prepare a petition for people to sign so that I can win my case. On the other hand, if I believe that doctors save lives, I can do the same thing and also fight to win my case.
In other words, where you put your attention on, your mind will find evidence to help you win the case. This is how mind operates. It's not your fault. It's nobody's fault, it's simply how it works. So, you must understand that you are not your mind, and that your mind is just a tool for you to live in this world.
Your mind is like wild horses! Your body is the wagon and you are the coachman! If you don't control those horses they will break the wagon and throw you on the ground!
No matter what you believe, your mind will look for evidence to prove it's right, and to fight. The reason this happens is because we were programed since small ages to defend ourselves, to compete, to win the game.The thing is that there is no game! Life is a series of experiences and you are here to live these experiences!
I would like to invite you to drop your boxing gloves and reflect upon times when you started to make assumptions about someone or something and these assumptions became your truth. Perhaps you had arguments with someone, or you broke up a relationship , or felt so helpless that you had to call others to help you through the fight.
Watch this video, where I'm helping my client Susan Pixley to recognize the conflicting energy that has been stoping her to create the life she would love to live. This is part 3 of the Energy Leadership Assessment Debrief that I provide to my clients before coaching sessions. It reveals how your attitude is impacting the unfolding of your life's stories.
I hope this video helps you reflect and reframe any conflicting energy you may have in your life right now.
Check out some life coaching experiences I'm offering at the AirBnb site: Sunrise and Sunset Vortex Hikes, Talisman Making and Vortex Dance. https://www.airbnb.com/experience-hosting/listings?from_nav=1 Download my e-book - How To Mend Your Broken Heart - it's FREE! https://jjcb-pro.builderall.net/rg-lm1
Much love Rosane http://www.ARoadToYou.com DOWNLOAD MY E-BOOK - HOW TO MEND YOUR BROKEN HEART - IT'S FREE!
"Change the way you look at things and the things you are looking at changes" ~ Wayne Dyer
When we're busy living our lives, it seems that we don't find time to stop to re-focus, and then life happens by chance. When we open our eyes we find ourselves among disappointments and hurts and is natural to want to blame the world...
However, life is not to blame, not even others. It's not our fault either. After all, we weren't born with a life manual!
There are two ways to learn: to fall and get hurt, then stand up again, or to learn how your mind works and practice being mindful.
Our minds are like a radio station. You cannot hear FM when you tune into AM. The same way happens when we think self-defeating thoughts - we can't tune in to a great life.
So, we will keep attracting situations, people and circumstances that resonate in that wave link. Understand? Life will be like a broken record, you will re-live the same energy in different scenarios. No matter where you go, you will keep encountering the same type of annoying people, or the same type of work that you don't like, or even broken heart situations...
If this is happening to you, if you find yourself in a cycle of unfortunate events, you must learn how to shift your perception about things, so things can change. You must become mindful.
To be mindful is to be consciously aware, by using the mind to serve us, instead of being its slave. It's not easy to learn how to be mindful, because we are so used to identify ourselves with our thoughts that we just don't know how to start. But it's possible!
In this video, my client Susan has allowed me to share a clip from our debrief session so that you can see how the process of coaching works.
The first step is an assessment of the situation and acknowledgment of feelings and emotions. You may resonate with Susan, or you may not, but whatever you are going through I hope this inspires you to also acknowledge where you are right now.
Now, it's your turn, click reply and say hi! Stay in tune for other clips like this.
In my e-book, I share several processes (exercises) that will help you release your emotional pain and move on with your life. In this video I talk about the process of giving voice to your pain. You say with your own words, what is your pain like, in a symbolic way.
For example, to me in the beginning of my broken heart healing process I would say: - I feel that I was stabbed in the back... Then as time went by, I used to say: - I feel like I am living in this dark wet cave, lonely and hopeless... This changed to: - I feel I'm a lonely bird flying alone in the sky.
See how it progresses? This is a great way to witness your own healing. So, what is it like to be where you are right now? If you could translate your feelings to an image, what would that be?
There's great love for you here, and there's a life ahead for you to live, and you need to open the windows of your heart so that the sunshine can get through to you. Understand?
In other words don't lock yourself up to the world because it will only affect you, and your health. Please help me help you even further by writing your story, or your question in the comments below.
Remember, your comment can also help other people who are going through similar situation.
The cycle of complaining starts with a problem, sometimes a small problem... Let's say you had a problem at work where you did something wrong, or your boss was not in a good mood and then you go home and talk about that problem: - He said this, I said that, and this and that happened... blah blah blah...
What happens is that you re-live that situation over and over again. You feel like you want to blame someone or you want to find fault in yourself, so you are between these two energies which are very low energies to live by. You bring words that enhance what happened in a way that you create an electrical magnetic field of complaining around yourself.
These electrical magnetic field will enhance your stage of complaining to a point that you will attract more situations for you to complain about! It activates a vibration in your whole being that will perpetuate this type of things to happen, and then you'll feel locked in a cycle of complaining.
You say: - How do I get out of this????
You get out the cycle of complaining by getting in the cycle of gratitude. I recommend you write everyday three reasons you are grateful everyday.
And then you may say: - I have nothing to say that I'm grateful for because my life is very hard!
Maybe your day is gonna be horrible and you feel like you have nothing to say that you are grateful for.... but, yes, you can find it! You're alive, you're breathing, you have a bed that you are sleeping on... you have food to eat... you can even be grateful for the pen you are writing with! Yes?
Magnify hight level energies by raising your vibrations to gratitude and you'll automatically attract new people, situations and circumstances that are different then what happens when you are in the cycle of complaining.
Next time you find yourself in the cycle o complaining shift it to the cycle of gratitude, so that you change your energy and you can have a different outcome in your life.
I want you to practice this because there's results!
Everyday you pick some things to be grateful for and instead of complaining about what you don't want, focus your attention on what you have and what's good and working for you right now... shift your energy instantaneously!
Did you know that the scale of energy vibration of gratitude is bigger then love?
Let's start vibrating in a way that you attract people and circumstances that are in the same wave link. You are gonna find people that are nicer to you, you won't have problems at work anymore, and your life is gonna be like we say in Brazil: bread and butter! So try it everyday - write three things that you are grateful for!
Another way to break the cycle of dissatisfaction is to notice. Become aware, as if you were your own police, by catching yourself when you have the same reaction that you had in the past.
Say: - I'm not going to react the same way because I'll be jeopardizing all the work I am doing with gratitude! How can I better express patience right now, from where I am to where I want to be by being more patient?
So, when situations arise you can say: - How can I be more patient as I look at this, and not take it personal. Thank you Universe for bringing this situation to me again so that I can practice to raise my vibrations to patience and gratitude.
I hope you practice this, because if you don't practice it's like reading a book and we dont change because we read a book, we change when we practice. Namaste Rosane